Interesting Links for 13-08-2012

[andrewducker]

• My son's tattoo hurt me deeply. (Wow. Just Wow. I am so glad my parents weren't like this)
  (tags: wtf parents tattoos )
• What Tolkien Officially Said About Elf Sex
  (tags: viaNWhyte writing lotr elves sex tolkien )
• How India’s favorite TV show uses data to change the world (400 _million_ viewers!)
  (tags: data tv society india )
• Allergic diseases are gender related - more likely to take after your same-gendered parent
  (tags: allergies gender parents )
• Colour printing reaches its ultimate resolution
  (tags: colour printing technology )
• If I'm interpreting this correctly then Egypt is taking further steps to move from military dictatorship to actual democracy
  (tags: egypt democracy )
• Texas has the USA's only openly pansexual politican
  (tags: sex sexuality usa )
• The surprising truth about heroin and addiction
  (tags: heroin drugs addiction )

Comments

My son's tattoo hurt me deeply. (Wow. Just Wow. I am so glad my parents weren't like this)

[teresafloyd]

My parents were like this, and it's a hard impulse to overcome. Mom didn't want me to wear turtlenecks because she claimed they made her feel like she was choking (eyeroll).

I do understand feeling a little bit sad that your child has deliberately marked his skin, but that woman practically went nuts, and I don't think she ever even saw the tattoo! And her son seems to have thought about it, weighed options, got a tattoo he can hide if necessary, and had it done by a professional.

My kids are both adults and do I hope they don't choose to get tattoos? Yeah. I'd rather they didn't. In fact the one of them asked my opinion and I pointed out that he should do some research because he's allergic to nickel.

But one of the biggest lessons to learn as a parent is that your children own their bodies and their destinies. You may offer opinions or advice, but they are alays the ones who choose.

[dalglir]

Bump.

I had various reactions when my upper arm tattoo was discovered at a gathering of extended family. Some surprise. Some horror. Some bemusement. Some disappointment. The reaction from the parent in the article seems less 'cutting the apron strings' but more 'cutting the lift lines from a Chinook of helicopter parenting'?

Tattoos do come with some negatively loaded connotations depending on context and I think that was the biggest overall worry for parents. Not that they had any problems directly, but that they worried that other folk who i might meet might snap judgements on appearance.

[teresafloyd]

I think you've nailed it as cutting the lift lines.

It truly is fair for a parent to worry about how others, like potential clients/employers might react. It seems the kid in the article has wisely chosen some location where that isn't even an issue.

There comes a time where you have to trust that the adult you've raised is going to actually weigh options and make a wise decision.

[rmc28]

I mean, it's nice that she's being so honest about her emotions and acknowledging that she has snobbery issues, but she really needs to grow up and recognise that his body is his own. How has it taken her this long to realise that? She's acting like a teenager whose pristine action figures have been drawn on, not a person who has raised another person who dared to make his own decisions once he was an adult.

All the getting him to drink milk, clean teeth etc was about teaching him how to look after it, not taking care of something of her own.

My goal is to get my children to 18 (and ideally some time before then) able to look after themselves and make these decisions for themselves. Much easier than trying to do everything for them anyway.

[andrewducker]

Yeah - people seem to always worry what other people might think. Which makes you wonder whether there are more than a few loud people who care _themselves_.