Conspiracy Ahoy

[andrewducker]

The US Army has lost 2.3 trillion dollars.

Given three minutes, how many conspiracy theories can you come up with to explain where it all went?

Comments

[rahaeli.livejournal.com]

aw. come on, give me a tough one. ;)

We used to entertain ourselves in high school/college by thinking up good conspiracy theories and arguing for their merits. When we got bored, we'd switch theories and keep arguing. Got interesting when one minute you were arguing that it was all because of the damn Communists and the next minute someone would call 'switch!' and you'd be arguing against the oil barons. ;)

Its was Colonel Mustard...

[andrewducker]

Damn those Communist Oil Barons. We all know that those cattle-mutilating scum are behind it, using their orbital mind-control lasers (made using tech stolen from the Roswell crash) to cause people to give money to the liberal Media they use as a front to launder money from their Columbian drug-running operations (co-financed with the Vatican), thus deflating the market and bringing Glorious American Dream under their terrible control.

God Bless America!

Hail Eris!

Fnord!

Andy
(off to fix a problem with the accounting software. Which is DOS based, if you can believe that)

Re: Its was Colonel Mustard...

[rahaeli.livejournal.com]

Hail Eris! All hail Discordia!

I can believe it; for accounting software, hey, why mess with what works? Last job I worked, we were still using the old 3270 mainframe for client data.

[mcgroarty.livejournal.com]

My mom works for the government.

After hearing about the incompetence and high-priced nonsense that goes on in her tiny corner of the government, my response is "$2 trillion? That's all?"

I don't know how it is elsewhere, but in the US, low-level government and military offices are generally run by people who weren't good enough to find work in the corporate sector. And the corporate sector, in turn, preys on these pieces of the government and military. I've heard first-hand accounts of things like local computer "consultants" convincing offices with 30 PCs using the internet for email and web browsing to fit a $100k/year firewall contract into their budget.

Another such fun event involved a Gateway salesman performing $2,000-per-PC "Y2K compliance testing", then turning around and saying "Nope, none of your machines are Y2K compliant. But we can replace them with ones that are for $5,000 apiece." Worse, while several people thought it sounded questionable, all were afraid to make noise about it -- government whistle blowers have a history of finding themselves out of work in short order.