Gender Stereotypes

[andrewducker]

Following conversations with surliminal and coalescent

[Poll #978223]

Comments

[rollick.livejournal.com]

I didn't answer the first one, because I have absolutely no idea. I'd have to get used to being a guy before I'd have the vaguest idea of whether I'd want to be one. I mean, socially, I prefer being a woman. But physically? Emotionally? Who knows? It'd be worth trying just to see what the other set of plumbing and hormones is like, but I wouldn't weep or dance with joy automatically.

[robhu.livejournal.com]

I said a little happier because although I would prefer to be male, fall in love with, and marry a girl, I feel this is unlikely. If I were a girl it would be more likely I could have a close friendship with a girl, which although not quite as good as being in love if I were a guy is much better than having nothing.

Also, I should point out I said feel rather than think :-)

[awdrey-gore.livejournal.com]

I answered that the default gender is female due to the notion that all embryonic states begin as female then develop sex organs as the X or Y-chromosome dictates. Of course this answer is wrong on a strictly genetic level, but there you go - there were only three buttons to choose from!

[balthial.livejournal.com]

Same. I don't think you can ask this question straight out and get a meaningful response.

I conform to male stereotypes somewhat.

[drainboy.livejournal.com]

It depends if I woke to find myself as a hott* girl or not. If all else remained the same then hottness* would be the deciding factor. I'd probably prefer to be attractive in whatever gender than unattractive in the opposite.

What depth I find within!**

*I use this word ironically
**I use this term sarcastically

[wychwood]

I said that "male" was the default, because most of the time, socially and politically, it is. I think I'd be less happy if I changed, not because I necessarily think it would be so terrible to be a man, but because I'm relatively happy with my gender identity (however unfeminine it is in general), and it would be a fairly significant upheaval.

[bohemiancoast.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure I'd be terribly unhappy in and of myself per se, but I think it would scupper my marriage and seriously upset my kids.

[andrewducker]

Both very good points. Although I've certainly read of cases where one partner has "become" a transexual and there's been general acceptance by their partner/children, I'm sure it's by no means universal.

[heron61.livejournal.com]

Just as a note, I consider the default gender to be male, because sadly, that what the vast majority of people, and almost all of the people with money or power (at least in this nation) consider it to be.

[purpletigron.livejournal.com]

Male and female aren't genders.

Gender isn't binary.

[andrewducker]

While I thoroughly appreciate where you're coming from, the use of gender in that sense is (a) terribly new, (b) terribly fluid, and (c) accepted by a teeny proportion of the planet.

Certainly, according to the few dictionaries I have lying about, a quick check of online dictionaries, and some rapid wikipedia checking while gender has multiple meanings, at least one of them is always as a synonym for "sex".

The Universe does not have to keep a straight face

[purpletigron.livejournal.com]

I abhor language which obfusticates reality. Gender as a synonym for sex is at best, sloppy thinking, and at worst, prudishness.

genetic sex =/= phenotypical sex =/= sexual intercourse =/= sexuality =/= social gender

None of these concepts are binary.

Re: The Universe does not have to keep a straight face

[andrewducker]

"Gender" as a word seperate from "sex" is a terribly modern concept. And when the seperation between the two words began it was originally "sex" that had the cultural connotations while gender was the physical difference, it took a bit of a tug of war before it became the other way round.

Your second and third line are true, but nobody is disputing that. Merely that your usage of English is by no means more generally accepted or more accurate than mine.

[randomchris.livejournal.com]

I would be a little less happy. I like having a penis, and my wife is also keen for this state to continue.

[andrewducker]

I emailed you earlier today - the address on your profile. Did you get it?

[randomchris.livejournal.com]

Ah, just found it in my junk mail folder. *replies and looks conspiratorial*

[ashfae.livejournal.com]

True, but I would still absolutely stick with you if you were a girl. Mmm, breasts.

[kelly-lesbo.livejournal.com]

No offense Andy, but I think it's a pointless question. Much the same as asking if you think you'd be happier if you woke up another race or another animal. Even when someone gives an honest answer, it is probably at best, ill informed and at worst, a flight of fantasy bearing no relation to any reality.

Gender baby

[wordofblake.livejournal.com]

where is the "Freaked out" option.

I'd want to know how it happened, and I suppose the paranoia would make a significant impact on my happiness.

On the plus side I guess the expansion of formal dress beyond.. a suit, or another suit.... would be nice.

I have no idea how well I conform. I see myself as all boy, but then I guess I find football confusing and pointless whereas I like musicals, so who can tell.

[darkoshi]

If I woke up tomorrow and I was the opposite gender I would feel...

Based on your other comments, you are talking about physical sex. So if I woke up tomorrow and had a penis and otherwisely appeared male, I would be quite startled. It would be very difficult to explain this transformation to family, friends, and acquaintances. I doubt I have good skills at acting in an acceptably masculine fashion, which would probably make things difficult for me. Unless you mean my mental gender had also changed to a more masculine state, and I somehow was able to also perform in a masculine way.

Would I be happier to be physically male? I don't know. It would depend on what kind of body I got. A lean, fit, not-very-hairy body, or a fat, balding, hirsute one? A pretty face or a not so pretty face? Etc.
Would I be happier if my mental gender were male? In some ways, it is already. But if I no longer had the other parts, the female and/or androgyne parts, I would no longer be the same person, so I don't know if I would be happier that way or not. But I like my mental gender as it is, and don't want it to change.

I consider my gender to be androgyne, which doesn't really have an opposite. Unless one starts thinking in terms of undifferentiated (neither male nor female) androgynes vs both male&female-feeling androgynes. But androgyne-ness isn't really that clear-cut, nor gender in general. It gets confusing to think about if one thinks about it too much.

A more relevant question for me would be, if everyone else woke up tomorrow and were androgyne, and this whole business of males and females and sex roles and gender differences, etc. were gone, would I be happier? I think that in that case I would.


The default gender is...

I don't understand this question. If you are talking about physical sex, what does default mean in terms of that? Or even if you are talking about mental gender, what does default mean there? I think physical males on average tend to feel that they have a male mental gender, and that physical females on average tend to feel that they have a female gender. I happen to be female, and have a non-average mental gender of androgyne.

For me, my default gender is neither. But that doesn't make it the default gender for everyone else.

I conform to gender stereotypes...

I would say "a little", in terms of female gender. But I think I also conform to stereotypes of the male gender a little.

[thishardenedarm.livejournal.com]

If I woke up tomorrow and I was the opposite gender I would feel... like going back to Bennetts Bar and trying to pick up the spanish barman, as I was having no luck doing so as a man.

Yeah, I'd be happier. So would he.

[ashfae.livejournal.com]

By "default" I don't know if you mean the default for everyone or for me; for me, it's definitely female. I am a girl, and I like being a girl. It's just that simple, for me. If I were suddenly turned into a boy I'd enjoy it immensely if it were temporary, and probably get used to it if it were permanent, but I like being a girl too much to want to give it up. If nothing else, I'd miss my breasts.