andrewducker: (vulture vomit)
[personal profile] andrewducker
1. Start
2. Keep going.
3. You think you're starting to get the hang of it.
4. You see someone else's work and feel undeniable misery.
5. Keep going.
6. Keep going.
7. You feel like maybe, possibly, you kinda got it now.
8. You don't.
9. Keep going.
10. You ask for someone else's opinion--their response is standoffish, though polite.
11. Depression.
12. Keep going.
13. Keep going.
14. You ask someone else's opinion--their response is favorable.
15. They have no idea what they're talking about.
16. Keep going.
17. You feel semi-kinda favorable and maybe even a little proud of what you can do now.
18. Self-loathing chastisement.
19. Depression
20. Keep going.
21. You ask someone else's opinion--they respond quite favorably.
22. They're still wrong.
23. Depression.
24. Keep going though you can't possibly imagine why.
25. Become restless.
26. Receive some measure of praise from a trustworthy opinion.
27. They're still fucking wrong (Right?)
28. Keep going just because there's nothing else to do.
29. Mastery arrives, you mistake it for a gust of wind.
30. Keep. Fucking. Going.


From the comment thread under this post.

Date: 2010-11-30 09:44 am (UTC)
ext_267: Photo of DougS, who has a round face with thinning hair and a short beard (Default)
From: [identity profile] dougs.livejournal.com
Somewhere around 12/13, someone else asks you for your opinion.

Somewhere around 20, someone pays for your opinion.

Date: 2010-11-30 09:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nancylebov.livejournal.com
Effort shock.

The destructive belief that there's something magical about people with great accomplishments.

As for your list, I suspect it leaves out something important-- the pleasure of working on the project. With very few exceptions, I think people don't put in that sort of effort unless there's something they find satisfying about working with their material.

Date: 2010-11-30 05:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 19-crows.livejournal.com
I'm not sure I agree about the pleasure of working on a project. Most of the things I've learned at work (bank card processing, COBOL programming, tech writing) aren't things that interest me a lot outside of work - I'm not one of those people who was building electronic things as a kid and then got into computers, it's something I fell into to get out of being a clerk at a bank). But I've always enjoyed the process of learning, of seeing myself get better at something, no matter what it is. And as someone who was a "gifted" student and always the best reader in the class, it's been useful to experience having to work at learning something, after so many things came easy to me. Until they didn't, and I didn't know what to do.

Date: 2010-11-30 05:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 19-crows.livejournal.com
I agree with both the comments, but I still like this a lot. (and thanks for the link to an interesting blog.)

Date: 2010-11-30 10:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heyokish.livejournal.com
nice.

see also: "Before enlightenment chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment chop wood, carry water."

Date: 2010-11-30 11:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ashfae.livejournal.com
I think I'm going to print this and frame it and hang it up on the wall.

Date: 2010-12-02 07:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anef.livejournal.com
I think this also describes quite well the process of writing - at some points there may also be publication, or not.

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