Losing your equilibrium

Penny Arcade had this rather good review of Equilibrium, which I'm looking forward to:

It is the same thing with Equilibrium. I firmly believe that objectivity is mythological in this context, people just like some things or don't like them, and then they craft elaborate mechanisms after the fact to explain why or why not. Many reviewers, for instance, get really caught up on some of the material the film uses for inspiration - classic dystopian works like F451 or Brave New World - isn't treated the way they think it should be. I don't know if somebody told them it wasn't an action movie, or what, but this narrative quality compares favorably with most, if not all, movies of the genre. I don't know if you've seen Commando. It's not Proust. Nor is Equilibrium Orwell. It takes what it needs to and hurtles forward.

The cries of "Matrix Ripoff" were predictable, but sort of sad. To paint The Matrix as some kind of solitary, unaided fundamental of modern sci-fi action without recognizing the liberal plunder of Gibson, Stephenson, and Woo is laughable. I don't want to hear it. You don't have to hate Equilibrium to like The Matrix, or vice-versa. They aren't sporting teams, they're fucking action movies. And if you think that Gun-Kata, the fighting style of the Grammaton Clericks is somehow derivative of The Matrix, then you are an alien being from another planet. Who knows how, or why, but they pulled off two of the most inventive action scenes I've ever witnessed. I actually covered my mouth with my hand and stopped breathing.

I guess it depends why you're going to it. I expected sci-fi lite with inventive action scenes, and pow, direct hit. If you're expecting 1984: The Movie it is not for you, and if you're expecting a big-budget special effects spectacular this is not for you.

Ouchie

Apparently I have a "Strong Automatic Bias towards White People".

Go here and take the test.

Oh, and I actually noticed during the test itself too. It's not nice watching yourself hesitate over associations you know are wrong.

Fellowship of the Panto

Just back from seeing Fellowship of the Panto. I hope all you American's out there know what Panto is, because I really can't be bothered explaining.

But if I tell you that it opened with 9 black clad women dancing and singning the opening prologue from Fellowship as the Nazgul, then you'll start to get the picture. If I carry on by telling you that the Elves spoken in Elvis (various apposite lyrics), the hobbits were all played by short women, Tom Bombadil had lines from Labyrinth (and a son called Moon Unit) you'll probably know exactly where you are.

Somewhere very, very funny. It was all amateur dramatics, all over the top, and all very funny.

Aragorn was portrayed as a pervy hobbit fancier, persuading Arwen to dress up in hobbit feet (the hobbits all wore big fluffy slippers, in one case Pikachu slippers), before she told him that "Nothing I do in this film matters, I'm a girl, I'm just here to make you look sexy". The Prancing Pony was a gay bar (and with a name like that I'm not surprised), Saruman (pretending to be good) hid his Orc army under his dress (Gandalf and Saruman both wore dresses. Oh, and pointy hats, of course), and the piece de resistance - the Balrog was played by a picture of Anna Kournikova on a big pole, while the cast were exhorted to "react to the picture, we'll block in the CGI later". The guy holding the pole then told Gandalf he had more Kournikova pictures at home, only with her head on "other people's bodies", to which Gandalf replied "Oh, look, I'm falling into Shadow!" and snuck off with him.

If you're withing 30 miles of Edinburgh, I recommend phoning the Bedlam for tomorrows performance (the final one). Well, well worth a look,