Simplifying the argument

[andrewducker]

There are two messages we're consistently bombarded with by tv and film when we're growing up:

"Be true to yourself."
"Don't be an asshole."

I'd like to know - which one is it? Am I allowed to be an asshole if that's being true to myself? Or should I subsume my personality in order to fit in, if my personality isn't a nice one?

Comments

[wolflady26.livejournal.com]

Be true to yourself, so long as that doesn't make you an asshole.

Because, you know, at their basest, everyone is an asshole. We all have to struggle to overcome those tendencies. Only some are successful, and others aren't ;)

[andrewducker]

By "at their basest" do you mean "at their worst" or "at their innermost"?

[wolflady26.livejournal.com]

Innermost, sorry.

[andrewducker]

In which case I disagree :->

I do think that a lot of people are deep-down selfish, but I also think a lot of people are deep-down generous.

Some people seem to manage both, and I think it depends entirely on how safe/secure they feel. People who feel safe, comforted and secure are far more likely to be nice to those around them.

I feel a journal entry coming on :->

[ekatarina.livejournal.com]

The message I absorbed was "Be true to yourself. Your true self is a nice quiet, unassuming, non-inconvenient person."

Katja, who strives to live a life of usefulness and not be "in the way" of anybody.

[thefirethorn.livejournal.com]

I think that is what is called a fine line.