(no subject)

[andrewducker]

Just had my quarterly performance review.

Apparently I am able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, crush coal into diamonds and fly so fast that I can travel backwards in time.

More time was spent on my manager's worries that I might become bored and understretched at work than on any other topic.

I demand that:
a) I be declared Emperor of Earth immediately.
b) Cutting equipment be used to enlarge all the doors here so that my newly enlarged head can fit through them.

Comments

[allorin.livejournal.com]

I demand that:
a) I be declared Emperor of Earth immediately.

Well, yeah - except I'm better than you....

[andrewducker]

That's it!

I challenge you - winner to be declared Ruler of Earth, loser to spend the rest of their lives in a dungeon.

[allorin.livejournal.com]

Sounds fair.

First person to 6'4" wins....

[andrewducker]

It's obvious to everyone that 5'10" is the perfect height.

Therefore the competition should be to acheieve as close a height to 5'10" as you can - overshooting being as bad as an inability to reach that height in the first place.

Re:

[allorin.livejournal.com]

I wasn't talking about height.... ;+P

[spaj.livejournal.com]

I think that the "invaders" had it right. (thank you Johnen V.)

We should crown our tallest our leaders.

So 6'4" wouldn't be bad, per se. You could be one of my lieutennants, or something.

Andy, you'll make an excellent drone.

Adam

[totg-kabu.livejournal.com]

I have no opposition to any one ruling the world, however every ruler requires a Mildly Malicious Grand Vizier, a position I believe would be most adequately suited to me.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....

[drainboy.livejournal.com]

I presume this glowing review came with the acquisition of no more money?

[allorin.livejournal.com]

Actually, he owes them.

They have to pay to have his keyboard cleaned once a week....

[andrewducker]

I get one formal review - in September. I get two informal ones (January/May).

Pay rises happen in November.