I am just back from seeing Prometheus, and I am seething with nerd rage

[andrewducker]

I spent most of the walk/bus trip back home working out all the epicly stupid things in the film.

And then I saw that my friend Scott had linked to this review, which happily lists lots of them, so I don't have to.

The big two I thought of that he doesn't list are:
1) that they take their helmets off when the air is breathable. Which boiled my blood to the "they all deserve to die" level. Because who goes in search of mankind's creators and doesn't imagine that they might share diseases with us?
2) Could they not have run the script past one fucking biologist and tried to get _them_ to think of a few plausible answers? If the aliens created mankind in their own image (with "identical DNA", whatever that's supposed to mean) then why are we so closely related to numerous other species? The whole "I choose to believe" line that was used as a riposte there had me wanting to fling Elizabeth Shaw out of the nearest airlock.

But frankly I could start poking even more small holes in it, but my blood pressure doesn't need it.

Plus points: Looks gorgeous, great sound, very tense, nice visual design.
Minus points: Written by one of the people behind Lost and the Star Trek reboot. And it really shows. Could have been a much, much, better movie in the hands of a decent writer who can actually grapple with big ideas, characters and plot at the same time.

Comments

[matgb]

Re point 1), I'm rereading Macleod's Newton's Wake, and I really liked the way that was handle when the Carlysle's first turn up on mystery planet and the suit working things through and reworkign their immune systems. I thought that was a nice little touch. Maybe, y'know, that's what the Prometheus suits did but they didn't feel the need to show it?

Or, y'know, Holywood...

(not seen it yet, Jennie has though).

[andrewducker]

In which case one of the scientists wouldn't have been shouting "No, you fool!" at him when he did it. And then, staggeringly, following suit when he did't drop dead of ebola instantly.

[rhythmaning.livejournal.com]

I was planning on going. Now I'm not so sure...

[momentsmusicaux.livejournal.com]

> Plus points: Looks gorgeous, great sound, very tense, nice visual design.

Yup. And apart from that, nothing really makes much sense.

And yes, I was wondering whether humans were created before or after the dinosaurs...

[andrewducker]

If you're going to see it, then see it on the big screen. The design/sound/cinematography is all amazing, and won't look nearly as good in your living room.

[crm.livejournal.com]

but... fassbender cant be in a bad movey.... Oh god save ireland should this happen to his Tain project, there wont be enough D's in the world for the D: ill be feeling.

[despotliz.livejournal.com]

I saw it in 2D, I think it might be one of the few films worth watching in 3D, because I bet the bit where David finds the universe map is gorgeous.

Other than that, yes, the plot and script are a load of bibble.

) Could they not have run the script past one fucking biologist and tried to get _them_ to think of a few plausible answers?

DEAR RIDLEY SCOTT, YOU CAN CALL ME FOR ADVICE. REALLY.

[andrewducker]

I saw it in 3D. It was pretty, and worked pretty well, presumably because it was actually filmed in 3D. But that bit didn't seem to make use of it much, and you're right, it should have looked even prettier.

[andrewducker]

Oh, the bender of Fass was incredibly good. Amazing job as the Android. The acting was generally good, and he was clearly the best of them.

[cavalorn.livejournal.com]

Did a huge spoilery analysis, based partly on very revealing Ridley Scott comments in subsequent interviews. Would be interested in your opinion.

http://cavalorn.livejournal.com/584135.html

[andrewducker]

That's genius.

I would like to know more about the way the black goo is supposed to respond to the wishes of those around it - and I'm prepared to believe that has a good explanation somewhere.

It doesn't help me with the stupidity of the main characters in the film, of course :->

[andrewducker]

Oh, and I have to say I _loved_ the reaction of the Engineer to Weyland. I thought it was perfectly fitting for him to have that kind of reaction to an android, and to its creators.

[cavalorn.livejournal.com]

That moment, I think, hearkened back to Blade Runner. Roy Batty, another created entity who has become aware that he is created, confronts his maker, Tyrell, and demands 'more life, fucker'. Tyrell can't grant that to him and gives him patronising speeches about 'burning twice as bright', so Batty destroys him.

But when Weyland (who also demands more life) confronts HIS maker, the vengeful wrath goes the other way.

[cavalorn.livejournal.com]

I'm just inferring how the black goo works, really. The only bits I'm sure of are the Ridley-derived parts and the mythological symbolism.

[snowking.livejournal.com]

Everyone in this film was a huge robophobe. Especially the mad wrestler.

[headinclouds.livejournal.com]

I'm also just back from seeing it, and the two things you list were my biggest gripes when I came out. That 'I choose to believe it' thing had me frothing with rage.

[coyotegoth.livejournal.com]

Ah, well; at least Scott is working in SF again... *rueful*

[f4f3.livejournal.com]

I think it's on at the IMAX upstairs from where I'm having dinner. Still toying with the notion of going.

[lil-shepherd.livejournal.com]

If you take the consensus of reviews on both Rotten Tomatoes and the viewer reviews on IMDB -- which I have been watching in fascination -- you get a clear picture of Prometheus which runs: great visuals, marvellous acting from Fassbender, shame about the script, and the plot, and the stupidity of the so-called 'scientists'.

[elmyra.livejournal.com]

Thanks for saving me 15 quid, I had been toying with the idea of going to see it. Does it pass Bechdel, BTW?

[channelpenguin.livejournal.com]

It was beautifully shot and looked gorgeous...... but yeah not so much plot holes as a huge set of holes not even knowing it needed to look for a plot.

[andrewducker]

It was still fascinating to watch.

Definite pass. Multiple female characters. At least one conversation about plot stuff.

[cairmen.livejournal.com]

The 3D appeared to basically be irrelevant. I'd prioritise a big screen with good sound balance.

[gonzo21.livejournal.com]

Damn, that was going to be the defining thing for me, whether or not the script was any good. Going to the cinema is a fairly large investment these days, and I'm sick of spending money to see films where I come out afterwards and think, well that was all very pretty, but YE GODS THE STORY MADE NO SENSE!

[andrewducker]

I don't really blame them, given the creepiness of the robot. When people start referring to "You people" and then impregnating them with alien lifeforms, it makes me twitchy.

[octopoid-horror.livejournal.com]

Why would writers want a film to include plausible science when vast sections of the cinema-going public (possibly a majority - I try not to think about it) prefer to believe fake science of various kinds in real life, let alone whilst watching films?

If 10% of people who see a film know that, for example, guns don't work that way, but 90% think from watching films that guns DO work that way (or, importantly, that guns always work that way in films and that's A-OK), it makes sense to please the 90%.

I wonder if it was meant to illustrate (loosely) what happens when a philanphropist funds "science" for the heck of it and is more interested in the "WOO ALIENS WHO MADE HUMANS" hypothesis rather than actual science.

[andrewducker]

If they don't want to, then that's fine. But in that case, they shouldn't go out selling their movie as being SRS MOVIE ABOUT SRS THINGS.

I wouldn't dream, for instance, of pointing out scientific inaccuracies in either Transformers or Dr Who.

But if you're going issue press releases about how This Is Important Stuff, Which NASA would agree with, then you have to live up to that.

[octopoid-horror.livejournal.com]

Ah - I didn't see such press releases since I don't really follow that kind of news (well, not news per se, but you know what I mean) these days.

(That said, "what happens if I poke this?" is how a fair few scientific advances have happened)

[andrewducker]

The bringing the head back was an act of hubris that I could see as causing lots of problems, while being understandable (happening in a hurry, etc.)

But who goes to an alien world without writing up some protocols for what to do when you get there, prepping the team, or even introducing them to each other before they leave? It was the staggering incompetence that got to me more than anything.

"Oh look, something that looks like a skinned cobra, down to the threat display. I think I'll tickle it under its chin."

[octopoid-horror.livejournal.com]

If they hadn't been staggering incompetent, the film would have been less dramatic in much the same way that when Our Bold Protagonists stick together in that big dark possibly haunted house, it's harder for bad things to happen :-p

[andrewducker]

But said protagonists are usually a bunch of college kids, known for their hormone-filled stupidity.

It would be perfectly possible for them to behave reasonably sensibly and _still_ have it go wrong.

[octopoid-horror.livejournal.com]

I suppose that Shaw and uh, the guy, were set up from the start as crap scientists, who already believed their own hypothesis to be true and were just keen on proving themselves right rather than finding out if they were right.

It's a modern film though - there's doubtless an extra hour or two saved for the Blu Ray and/or 10th anniversary rerelease.

[andrewducker]

I'll see if Ridley does 17 director's cuts, one of which has a crew which doesn't have an IQ of 70.

[kurosau.livejournal.com]

I find it strange that you're leveraging these two points. I think the first point is basically irrelevant given sci-fi genre conceits and the second skirts the real problem with the biology in the film, in that you could easily make the film's ideas work as long as you supported them correctly.

That said, I don't think you can say the writing can be linked to Star Trek. Lost, sure, because that was Damon Lindehofs baby, but he's much less of an influence on Star Trek. The guys that screwed that one up are the same geniuses behind Star Trek, Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman.

As far as Prometheus goes? The real problems it had were many and replete. The backstory wasn't constructed well. The timeline didn't quite work. The reasoning behind the aliens wasn't really there. There weren't any well developed characters and no one to build any real empathy with. Stupid stupid stupid scientists.

It was an interesting brain teaser, but ultimately an unsatisfying film for me.

[andrewducker]

Those two points were two of the ones that annoyed me _that weren't already in the linked article_.

[octopoid-horror.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry you went to see a big budget sci-fi film :-)

[kurosau.livejournal.com]

Right, but my original point still stood, I didn't understand why those would be two big things that got to you.

[andrewducker]

Oh for goodness sake.

If in Alien we'd seen the asteroid miners hitting each other with rocks and justifying it as "That's what miners do." then it would have pulled people out from any belief in it. That's basically what happened in Prometheus.

If you didn't care that the characters were unbelievable, that it failed to grapple with any of the big ideas it tried to, then that's fine. But I was annoyed by it - because it set things up to be _better_ than that, and then failed at it.

I can happily watch Aliens, because the writer cared about making a good movie. They have a reason for not taking the big guns with into their first alien encounter, and it makes that reason fit within the movie. This movie instead had an appallingly unbelievable line for the same purpose that failed to do anything except make the characters look like idiots.

[andrewducker]

Because the first destroyed any faith I had that these people were going to be portrayed as competent, and the second destroyed any faith I had that Ridley Scott was interested in grappling with actual big ideas, rather than just making shit up.

As I'd signed up for a movie wherein Ridley Scott would throw interesting ideas, and scientists would try and find the secrets of the universe in a competent manner, this pissed me off.

[kurosau.livejournal.com]

I see your meaning now. I think the thing that has disappointed me the most is the Space Jesus connection drawn from that one linked analysis. Although I think he's incorrect about the magic space ooze theory.

[soon_lee]

Just saw it. Lovely cinematography.

But. All of the characters were TEH STUPID! And they are all supposedly intelligent competent people!

[soon_lee]

It's about expectations. It was sold as a fine dining experience but what we got was a Big Mac served up in an elegant restaurant. It doesn't matter how good the restaurant was otherwise, it was still a Big Mac.

Me, by the time I got to the end I was tired out - that Vickers didn't understand the concept of "perpendicular"* was just yet another stupid thing about the movie.

*When something massive is slowly falling toward you, running in the direction of its trajectory (rather than in a perpendicular direction)? Too dumb to live.