Lessons learned
Apr. 27th, 2006 01:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
andrewducker4 years ago I left one of the best jobs I'd ever had because the company was taken over by people I really didn't want to work for. It became very clear during the takeover process that they were going to screw the owner (who I was friendly with) for every penny they could get from him, and I had a feeling that they would treat their staff in much the same way.
I therefore took the first job I could get, which turned out to be an enormous mistake. I was offered it, didn't think it was my kind of thing, asked them to give me a couple of days to think about it, and then thought "What the Hell, how bad can it be?" which just goes to show the depths of naivety and ignorance I can occasionally sink to.
I was the IT manager for a small company (around 80 people), and I have to say I made a terrible job of it. When I arrived the machines were in a terrible state, and it took me a good 6 months of hard work (with one assistant) to get beyond the 'running to stand still' stage to the point where I was actually improving things rather than just slowing their entropic slide into decrepitude.
And by that point any initial enthusiasm I'd had had been ground out of me, leaving me keeping things ticking over, but not actually moving forward at all. I began searching for a new job, eventually got my current one, and was actually pretty gratified when they decided to outsource my job rather than renewing my one-year contract.
I learnt three important things from this job, and so I don;'t resent it as much as I might have done.
1) I am not a manager. No, really, this was the main reason I was reluctant to take the job in the first place, and it turned out that my initial misgivings were correctly placed. I like 'doing stuff', I score spectacularly low as a 'completer/finisher'and I really don't have the kind of mind that is necessary for following intricate processes to the letter and getting everything signed off. And yes, this is sometimes an issue in my current job, but I _can_ do it when necessary - I just don't want a job that's mostly made of it.
2) I am not a maintenance person. Looking after broken computers/systems and nursing them back to life drives me insane. Seriously, when my computer goes wrong I get a horrible clenched feeling in my gut that doesn't go away until at least an hour after I've got it all working again and am vaguely reassured that it's not going to fall over again. I like computers because you can make them do cool stuff, and it's primarily that cool stuff I enjoy, not the underlying mechanics that it relies on. Handing me one sick computer after another is just putting me into the stressfull 'broken' place I despise, with the knowledge that when I do fix it I won't actually get to play with the damn thing.
3) I need sleep. I was commuting from Stirling to Glasgow, waking at 6:30 to get the 7:30 train, changing to a bus and heading out the other side of Glashow to be there for 9:00. Naturally speaking I seem to work best between the hours of 2pm and 9pm. I can manage to function earlier than that, but I currently make full use of flexi-time to work 10am - 5:30pm (with a half-hour lunch) and I frequently find that as the allowed working hours time ends (6pm) I could happily stay another hour to finish things off. Being awake at 6:30 in the morning really doesn't work for me, I just spend most of the time feeling slightly nauseous and out of focus, lacking in concentration and working at half-capacity. This is not helped by the fact that most of the people I know seem to be even further round the clock than I am, and going to bed when there are still interesting conversations going on is something I find pretty hard. I've got better at it, but I'm never going to manage it without a certain amount of 'separation anxiety'. I'm not at all surprised that I wasn't doing a great job, or lacking enthusiasm, I spent most of my time that year feeling like I was getting over a virus.
In fact, this last point was what triggered my whole post - I had to be at work early on Thursday, so that I could get some extra few bits and pieces done, and also so I could leave early on Friday to go Southwards to my parents.. I was staggering towards work, under the nearby railway tunnel at some obscene hour in the morning (I know that 7:30 isn't obscene to some of you, but I'm usually asleep until 8:15, and naturally I wake up around 10am), when I realised that the sensation I was feeling was a familiar one - it was the Living Dead sensation that burrowed under my skin and became so much a part of me during the year I commuted. Not a happy sensation, and one I intend to avoid as much as possible from now on.
I therefore took the first job I could get, which turned out to be an enormous mistake. I was offered it, didn't think it was my kind of thing, asked them to give me a couple of days to think about it, and then thought "What the Hell, how bad can it be?" which just goes to show the depths of naivety and ignorance I can occasionally sink to.
I was the IT manager for a small company (around 80 people), and I have to say I made a terrible job of it. When I arrived the machines were in a terrible state, and it took me a good 6 months of hard work (with one assistant) to get beyond the 'running to stand still' stage to the point where I was actually improving things rather than just slowing their entropic slide into decrepitude.
And by that point any initial enthusiasm I'd had had been ground out of me, leaving me keeping things ticking over, but not actually moving forward at all. I began searching for a new job, eventually got my current one, and was actually pretty gratified when they decided to outsource my job rather than renewing my one-year contract.
I learnt three important things from this job, and so I don;'t resent it as much as I might have done.
1) I am not a manager. No, really, this was the main reason I was reluctant to take the job in the first place, and it turned out that my initial misgivings were correctly placed. I like 'doing stuff', I score spectacularly low as a 'completer/finisher'and I really don't have the kind of mind that is necessary for following intricate processes to the letter and getting everything signed off. And yes, this is sometimes an issue in my current job, but I _can_ do it when necessary - I just don't want a job that's mostly made of it.
2) I am not a maintenance person. Looking after broken computers/systems and nursing them back to life drives me insane. Seriously, when my computer goes wrong I get a horrible clenched feeling in my gut that doesn't go away until at least an hour after I've got it all working again and am vaguely reassured that it's not going to fall over again. I like computers because you can make them do cool stuff, and it's primarily that cool stuff I enjoy, not the underlying mechanics that it relies on. Handing me one sick computer after another is just putting me into the stressfull 'broken' place I despise, with the knowledge that when I do fix it I won't actually get to play with the damn thing.
3) I need sleep. I was commuting from Stirling to Glasgow, waking at 6:30 to get the 7:30 train, changing to a bus and heading out the other side of Glashow to be there for 9:00. Naturally speaking I seem to work best between the hours of 2pm and 9pm. I can manage to function earlier than that, but I currently make full use of flexi-time to work 10am - 5:30pm (with a half-hour lunch) and I frequently find that as the allowed working hours time ends (6pm) I could happily stay another hour to finish things off. Being awake at 6:30 in the morning really doesn't work for me, I just spend most of the time feeling slightly nauseous and out of focus, lacking in concentration and working at half-capacity. This is not helped by the fact that most of the people I know seem to be even further round the clock than I am, and going to bed when there are still interesting conversations going on is something I find pretty hard. I've got better at it, but I'm never going to manage it without a certain amount of 'separation anxiety'. I'm not at all surprised that I wasn't doing a great job, or lacking enthusiasm, I spent most of my time that year feeling like I was getting over a virus.
In fact, this last point was what triggered my whole post - I had to be at work early on Thursday, so that I could get some extra few bits and pieces done, and also so I could leave early on Friday to go Southwards to my parents.. I was staggering towards work, under the nearby railway tunnel at some obscene hour in the morning (I know that 7:30 isn't obscene to some of you, but I'm usually asleep until 8:15, and naturally I wake up around 10am), when I realised that the sensation I was feeling was a familiar one - it was the Living Dead sensation that burrowed under my skin and became so much a part of me during the year I commuted. Not a happy sensation, and one I intend to avoid as much as possible from now on.
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indeed..
Date: 2006-04-27 12:45 pm (UTC)I've long held that no job is worth completely losing it over (though I might have lost site of that a few times in the last year or so).
I try to keep my self in perspective with what I call my 'burger king rule' - whatever I do, I make sure that I can keep life and limb together even if I were only working at Burger King. In practice, that means mortgage - 'lodger's rent' must not be more than I could earn on about minimum wage. Still just about do-able, though only once I get this kitchen finished.
*goes back to chopping wood*
no subject
Date: 2006-04-27 01:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-27 02:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-27 02:49 pm (UTC)I can progress a pretty long way in my company without having to go near management.
no subject
Date: 2006-04-27 02:49 pm (UTC)Agreed
Date: 2006-04-27 06:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-29 09:32 pm (UTC)More or less, the end result is that I spent year nine in hospital. Still, every six am start for college does drain me - I'm markedly worse in tests on a thursday than I am on a monday. It's horrible. You just have to get used to it - or, be a lucky sod, and not do it at all.