Phones

[andrewducker]

I noticed a few reaction posts to my poll yesterday - and a fair amount of commentary that making phone calls unnerved quite a few people. It doesn't bother me at all, so I quizzed a few people about what it was about making phone calls they didn't like. Likewise with phone etiquette. Hence, a new poll.

[Poll #1278852]

Comments

[poisonduk.livejournal.com]

Damn you and your deliberately ambiguous poll choices to generate debate.
Answering my personal phone when with a friend would depend upon who was calling. Caller ID was invented for that purpose. Sooo if for example it was an unknown caller or someone who was probably chatting for a gossip I'd leave it to ring out, however if it was someone who I knew was having a hard time or a family member who rarely call I would probably answer as it could be someone in need, however I'd explain I was busy and would call back. In our workplace, as you well know, if I don't answer my phone in four rings it'll bounce to someone else in my team who'll tell them I'm busy or attempt to help. However again I'd use the caller ID and if I was expecting an important callback as i was in the middle of an incident I'd answer it. So ambiguity reigns on this poll. I answer 'It depends'

[flickgc.livejournal.com]

Making phone calls to people I don't know, I think, depends on which way the favour is going. If I'm ringing to book a restaurant, I'm doing them a favour (effectively, letting them do their job), so it's ok. If I'm ringing a restaurant to ask them a question in a survey, they're doing me a favour, so I don't like doing it.

Bad example, but you get the idea.

[robhu.livejournal.com]

I have a phone at work (this is unavoidable).

I have a VOIP phone at home, but it hasn't been plugged in for 6 months.

I have a landline at home but that hasn't been plugged in for several weeks.

I have a mobile but I don't know where it is.

I don't like phones that much. I used to use the phone a lot (calling a friend for hours every night), but I don't know anyone now who I'd do that with - and I prefer my contact to be via email or IM because it's more easily managed and efficiently processed.

Just think though - Knuth is another level on from this.

[andrewducker]

See, when it comes to arranging something with a single other person I frequently find phones more efficient, because you can have multiple responses in the space of 30 seconds.

"See you tonight?"
"Sure, 7:00?"
"8:00 is better. Your place or mine?"
"Julie's working at home tonight, how about yours?"
"So is Ed - meet in the pub?"
"Ok - The Regent?"
"Sorted!"
can all take place in the time it takes me to get an email and reply to it.

[robhu.livejournal.com]

It's fairly rare for me to meet with just one person - but in that eventuality it's usually handled by IM, which has the advantage that it can be done with a group of people in disparate physical locations.

In other cases it tends to be meeting in a group. I find email works well for this for about 4 or so sets of people (singles or couples lets say), but above that it doesn't work so well. For larger groups Doodle is fantastic for finding out when people are free (or what option they prefer).

Almost all my friends are very computer literate and active on the internet though. I imagine this wouldn't work if that weren't the case. One friend (who is a computer programmer) complains that social things get organised (not by me, but by some people) on Facebook (which she's not on).

[andrewducker]

Ooooh, Doodle looks very handy - thanks!

(I can't use IM at work, have plenty of friends who aren't on it, and sometimes organise things at the last minute, while away from the computer)

[poisonduk.livejournal.com]

In that example you are talking about a specific person who you are entirely happy to call and have that chat with. If however we started off in text and I hadn't previously made plans for a time and venue I would probably have called you in response to either your inital text, or in this case as you're the reciever I would have expected you to call me back. To me a text is generally a way of initiating a 'I would like to talk to you when it's convenient for you' type scenario, especially as I have mom commitements which I undertake most evening and can often be in the middle of homework support/making dinner.

[meaningrequired.livejournal.com]

My phone is always on silent = no interruptions when I'm with someone. It really annoys me when other people answer their phone when I'm midway through a sentence.

Also, me and Pam share the line in work (her's got removed), so she tends to answer the phone and screens calls for me :D

[miss-s-b.livejournal.com]

The second and third questions I have left blank, because it would depend what I was talking about, and who the call was from. In most cases, though, my answer would be "I would ask the person I am talking to if they mind me answering the call".

[cybik.livejournal.com]

Depends on who it is, a lot of the time. Although the concept of me at work talking to someone is a bit odd... *grin*

And I'm not sure why calling people I don't know scares me as much as it does, but of the options you gave, "not being able to see them" is probably the most accurate.

[ishkhara.livejournal.com]

Most of my responses would depend entirely on circumstance.

If I was speaking to a colleague at work and then phone rang then I would answer it, but if I was explaining something to a user then I would ignore the call. That's what we are taught as standard customer service practice - if you have an enquirer in front of you then you don't break off a conversation to answer the telephone.

At home I don't answer calls from people whose numbers I don't recognise. I'm on the Telephone Preference Service so I don't get many 'cold calls' but I have previously had malicious telephone calls from certain individuals. Although I blocked them they continued to use other people's phones to harass me so I no longer answer calls from unknown numbers. However people are welcome to leave a message on my answering service to let me know who they are and I'm quite happy to call them back. :)

[poisonduk.livejournal.com]

I got a row from a friend for this very thing. I _never_ answer withheld or unknown numbers on either my home or mobile phone. Which used to annoy a friend who was ex-directory and always came up 'with held'. I pointed out he'd made a decision to be ex directory for whatever his reasons were so I could have the right to not answer calls if the caller wasn't willing to let me know who they are. I pay for caller ID on my home phone specifically for this reason so I may as well use it.

[ishkhara.livejournal.com]

I do the same on my mobile too.

I don't have caller ID but most of the friends who call me regularly are programmed into my phone so that their name comes up when they call. I'm ex-directory myself, due to the previously mentioned crap, but I'm happy to leave a message and wait for the person I'm calling to get back to me.

[rhythmaning.livejournal.com]

Like the other respondents, it depends very much on the circumstances.

If I am in an office having a conversation and the phone goes, the conversation is already disturbed, so I'd answer it and tell them to ring back.

My mobile is usually on vibrate, so I can leave - it won't have disturbed the conversation, and the call will be picked up by voice mail.

Something I find really, REALLY infuriating is when people serving me in shops stop having a conversation with me to answer a ringing phone. I tend to walk out on them - it is just so rude that I don't want to be their customer!

[jrittenhouse.livejournal.com]

On answering calls, it depends on my own internal priorities to a degree. If I'm having a work conversation and a pal calls, I let it ring.
...but if it's a call on work that is a whole lot more important than the conversation I'm having, I will very briefly stop the conversation, take enough of the call to see about the importance for sure. If it's gonna be a while and it's important, I apologize to the person at my desk and offer to get back to them if there's more to say.

Same thing if it's a personal call coming in that is important (wife calling to say there's an emergency at home).

[chuma.livejournal.com]

I work from home so I can only really state I answer calls when they come in as I have to within work hours. If the phone goes other than that, I check Caller ID and make a decision; if I'm in the middle of something important then it can wait.

And as for txt spk or 1337... I personally type everything out in full on text messages. I would rather spend a little more time doing it than lower myself to the level of typing out g-r-8 or such. It actively pisses me off seeing it.

[random-redhead.livejournal.com]

I hate making phone calls but I am fine with answering the phone. Infact I am compulsive about answering the phone, I can't bear the ringing and often want to answer other peoples phones for them just to shut them up.
I hate making calls because I don't like asking for things and I don't like the idea of interupting the person in what they are doing.
On my own time I will always answer the phone, find out what the person needs from me. If it is just a chat I can ask if I can call back later but if it is an information seek I like to be there right away.

In shoprt, I am a person who needs to be needed and the phone is a clear signal of this.

[cangetmad.livejournal.com]

I always answer the phone at work when not in a meeting because that's my job. It's not really an option not to. At home I answer it when I feel like it - not during a meal, usually, and not after 10pm.

I am getting better at making phone calls, but I'd still prefer to use text of some kind where possible. I do, at least, not have to get other people to make my hairdresser appointments these days.

Though, your example above gets me too - the girlie habitually texts, which is no good when you're standing in the shop wanting to know if we need milk RIGHT NOW.

[andrewducker]

Yeah, the last bit really gets to me too. I try to get hold of Julie to check on something and can't because her phone's on silent, and it makes life much harder.

[http://users.livejournal.com/la_marquise_de_/]

I need to add re my answer to q. 1 that I will happily talk to strangers on the phone in context -- about work or whatever. But I dislike having to 'cold call' unless it's for a 'I need to book an appointment' type call. And what I really hate is having to cold call in another language (usually French, occasionally Welsh).

[e-halmac.livejournal.com]

On the first day of my first Real Job I had to begin organising a reminiscence programme for over 30 people - that got me over my calling people fear. But is was real fear for a longtime (even when I was working - quite effectively - in telephone sales) and I still have to gird my loins to actually pick up the phone.
And, as a few other people have mentioned, I think all my answers to the answering the phone questions would my tainted with "It depends" - on who was calling, which colleague/friend I'm talking too. But I hate other people who do it to me, so try not to do it to others, but it depends...

[marrog.livejournal.com]

It surprises me that you find the phone scary as I've always considered you someone who was good on the phone, and one of the people I'd probably call as often as I'd text.

[dougs.livejournal.com]

I reject your non-inclusive selection of answers.

1: Making phone calls to people I don't know bothers me because I hate to make an unsolicited contact.

2+3: It varies according to the topic of the existing conversation, and with whom I'm having it.

4 and 5 I've been able to answer.

[dougs.livejournal.com]

... although the answers to Q4 are coloured by the fact that "at home" and "at work" are synonymous.

[ashfae.livejournal.com]

I hate phones. I answer them when I must and screen calls when I can. Thank god for text messaging.

[channelpenguin.livejournal.com]

I have a weird phone-phobia. I have no trouble when ringing companies etc. Anything where there is really only one or two reasons that you might be phoning and it's all quite organised and formal. Phoning for a chat? *shudder*. My phone at home gets near-zero use. My parents phone me (and at least some of the time I deliberately don't answer). Absolutely no-one else ever does.

Email/texts rock, however.

[pennski.livejournal.com]

Well at work if I'm having a meeting at my desk, I put my phone on voicemail. If I'm chatting/ working on something and my phone rings I might well put it on immediate voicemail depending on who's calling.

And at home - well it all depends!

[wychwood]

Actually, I mostly hate talking on the phone because... I hate talking on the phone. Even if it's close friends, I still don't enjoy it. And I said I'd answer a ringing phone even if I was having a conversation, because the person I'm talking to knows I'm there and will return to them, whereas the person on the phone doesn't. This may be affected by the fact that I hate phones and therefore don't *have* long calls - if I'm getting a call, it's almost certainly something urgent / important / immediate, so I need to deal with it. I'd never start chatting on the phone if I was in the middle of a conversation. Generally I only use my phone to communicate via text (and occasionally Internet...). And a typical call goes something like "Hi. Do you need me to get anything? No? OK, bye." or "I'll be there in five minutes, is that ok?" *g*.

[sigmonster.livejournal.com]

I am deaf, and have told HR and colleagues that I ignore telephones. So calling strangers doesn't bother me at all: it just never happens...

I do use a phone at home, to talk to a very small number of people who I can understand that way (with heavy amplification through both phoneset and hearing aids - I try not to have anyone else in the room, it just annoys them). And the mobile is used for texts only.

[darkoshi]

In general, I answer the phone even when in a conversation with someone else, to make it stop ringing and to get whatever it is taken care of, not because I feel it would be rude not to answer. If I didn't pick up the phone, then I'd wonder who had called (I don't have caller-id) and/or I'd be wondering what message they had potentially left.

Obviously it would depend on whom I was having a conversation with and how important a conversation it was, whether I would interrupt it by answering the phone.