andrewducker (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
andrewducker) wrote2003-08-05 11:23 am
andrewducker) wrote2003-08-05 11:23 am
Blocked by pride
I find myself avoiding making journal updates when my head is fuzzy. I want to be liked and admired by the people on my friends list, and I'm well aware that I've been added by many of them because I write well enough to be interesting to them despite the fact that they don't really know me.
This leads to me avoiding making personal updates when my head feels fuzzy, and filling my journal with amusing links to elsewhere or with polls to inspire discussion. While I'm happy to have both of these in my journal, they seem to swell to fill any gaps left over when I stop posting my actual thoughts.
I think I need to force myself past this self-consciousness, to post even when I'm worried that I might be too fuzzy to make perfect sense. I'd like to get numerous aspects of my personality out on the internet not just the analytical side.
Strangely, just sitting here typing this has helped clear the fog somewhat. It's good mental exercise, picking the right words out of the air and pinning them to the screen. I sholdn't be ashamed when they aren't the perfect words. After all, who's going to remember this tomorrow?
This leads to me avoiding making personal updates when my head feels fuzzy, and filling my journal with amusing links to elsewhere or with polls to inspire discussion. While I'm happy to have both of these in my journal, they seem to swell to fill any gaps left over when I stop posting my actual thoughts.
I think I need to force myself past this self-consciousness, to post even when I'm worried that I might be too fuzzy to make perfect sense. I'd like to get numerous aspects of my personality out on the internet not just the analytical side.
Strangely, just sitting here typing this has helped clear the fog somewhat. It's good mental exercise, picking the right words out of the air and pinning them to the screen. I sholdn't be ashamed when they aren't the perfect words. After all, who's going to remember this tomorrow?
no subject
i'm a lot more insightful when i've had a decent night's sleep.
no subject
no subject
so now i'm feeling vaguely intelligent.. and have noone to talk to.
hah! the irony!
no subject
I'm off to T3 tonight, so I shan't be online much to entertain, I'm afraid.