Battle of the introverts

[andrewducker]

When I first met Jane I told her that I was introverted. And about two weeks later she laughed at me, pointing out how many friends I have, and how much I socialise.

Last night, when I couldn't sleep at 5am, I did a Myers-Briggs test* (to check that I was still INTP - I still am). And then this morning I got her to do it too.

Turns out that I'm 61% introvert/39% extrovert. And she's 94% introvert/6% extrovert. So to her, I look all the same as those extroverted people who leave the house, and talk to other people. And to me she looks like a tiny dot, fleeing into the introverted distance.

Preempting some of the comments - if you want to claim that MBTI is just a horoscope then you'll have to explain its correlation with the Big Five.

Comments

[myka]

I used to be surprised when I met people more introverted than me (like 2 of my lodgers were). But even though I still test as INTJ the percentages seem to get less extreme as time goes on --- just got 58% introverted on this one

[mountainkiss]

I'd advise being sceptical about the tests (both on line and official) independently of whether or not you find the Jungian model valuable. (Full disclosure: I have been working with clients using it for over twenty years.)

Introversion does vary in intensity and clarity of preference, but also comes in different forms. An interesting enquiry would be about the nature of the interactions you have with your extraordinarily wide network. Do you tend towards breadth or depth? Does smalltalk feel natural to you or pointless? Looking at the nature of the interactions, as well as their range and frequency, can help you to make sense of this. It's also worth reconnecting to the fundamentals of orientation and energy. Do you makes sense of yourself in terms of others or others in terms of yourself? And, in the end, do you go to people to get energy after being with yourself, or to yourself to get energy after being with people?

[zotz]

A correlation with the big five doesn't mean it isn't discarding a lot of information, or is using it in a good way. And given that there are other free tests available that don't share its faults, why not use them instead?

[randomdreams]

I have to say that both from how you talk and the things you describe yourself doing, I would never have characterized you as introverted.

[calimac]

Absolutely. It's all relative.

Which is why I find the test literally impossible to take. There's not a question on it to which my answer isn't one of "Compared to what?" or "Depends what you mean by that" or "Sometimes one, sometimes the other."

I'm introverted. I know that without the stupid test. When I was young, and hadn't heard of introversion, I thought I was shy. Then I met genuinely shy people, and hearing what they went through realized that no, that's not me at all. But before that, I would have answered "yes" to the question, "Are you shy?" That experience taught me to be wary of stupid tests like this.

[njj4]

I recently read Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain, and found it fascinating. In particular, it helped explain a lot about the way I react to social situations.

[agoodwinsmith]

I too, based on this journal alone, would never have thought of you as introverted - you talk to people! You meet people in groups! Often! You genuinely seem to thrive on spending time with others! Argh!

Regarding the popularity of the test: it is used by a lot of human resources departments as a team building tool. It is meant to only be administered by a qualified individual, but even when this is the case, the results are seldom used only by the qualified individual. It is quick and reasonably inexpensive to use, and gives teams a starting point for discussion of how to work together.

My sense (from having experienced its use in several corporate situations) is that it is a tool that extraverts like: either because it confirms their natural leadership skills, or because it remind them that their team members aren't duplicates of themselves.

Living in Canada, we're often measuring ourselves against Americans because we can usually only get American-based textbooks and materials. So, everything is prefaced by "remember that these are American statistics". One of the teams I belonged to spent some time comparing the percentages of the Myers Briggs types by country, and the USA has a much higher percentage of all the extravert types. So, if these personality types were innate, there should be less variation, and thus it is likely that these are personality tendencies, which environment can nurture selectively.

Also: self-reporting. Canadians take pride in being calm and a little reserved; Americans take pride in being friendly and gregarious. So my work answers will be different from my personal answers.

And context: in my family, my Dad's family is a bunch of raving ego-maniacs (confident friendly people), and with them I am a vanishing dot of introversion; but my Mom's family is a bunch of edge-dwelling mice (reserved calm people), and with them I am a raving ego-maniac. :)

And so: based on who I know and who I hang out with, you are one of the more extraverted people I know. :)

PS - poor speller check extravert and extrovert, and has decided to stick with extravert, but there's this:
https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/the-difference-between-extraversion-and-extroversion/

[yalovetz]

I'm a fairly extreme introvert. I've had a couple of work training exercises in my two most recent workplaces based on personality tests that measure introversion/extroversion. Both were in workplaces that probably select for introversion (statisticians, librarians) and in both I tested as one of the most introverted people in the room. And this was based on my 'work personality', which involves a fair bit of public speaking and generally being quite outspoken and personable. Like someone said above, I'm quite confident, not at all shy, and get lots of feedback that I'm very adept at handling really quite tricky interpersonal interactions and social situations. But I would really rather hole up on my own and hermit most of the time.

[jack]

Hah. Yes, that's interesting.

I think if I do any personality tests I need someone to help me. I always end up with questions where I'm like, "I'm not sure if the amount I do that is a lot" or "I do that, but only because I try really hard to force myself to" or "I technically do that, but I think I'm bad at the thing that it represents for most people" etc etc.

I could maybe cope with one that was a lot more specific.

I've talked before about thoughts about introversion, and different axes I tend to lump under that heading. For myself, I feel like do okay-ish at normal social stuff. But I tend to get bored of it quickly if I'm not really engaged. And even positive social interaction, I need a reasonable break from. And even people I'm really close to, I need *some* break from. I tend to use Liv as my model extrovert, and she seems to exhibit all those same tendencies, but with the limits in quite different places.