[identity profile] marrog.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 01:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Why on earth would you go and round up someone's fiancee and take them both to Venice together if you were into them???

In fairness, this is totally in-character for the Doctor, particularly given that he has some reason to believe that it's vital that Amy get 'sorted out' somehow and has decided that this means he needs to fix her relationship.

[identity profile] gonzo21.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 01:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, first of all, I think the Doctor and Amy have a lot of flirtatious chemistry. And the Doctor having a bit of a history when it comes to picking up young women to travel with...

Only as we have seen with Rose, when he gives in to these feelings, it always ends badly, because they die, or go away, or something happens. So when he picks up yet another young woman who has a crush on him, it makes sense for him to distract her by fixing things between her and her fiancee, to get him off the hook as object of attraction, no?

I mean, if the Doctor thought she had sexually assaulted him, his Tardis was right there, why did he take her with him?

I'm not saying she was right to do it. I agree, jumping on somebody who genuinely isn't into you, is absolutely not on.

But I don't think this makes what Amy did, a sexual assault. I think that's far too strong a word for it because my personal feeling is that calling it a sexual assault does a dis-service to people who have been sexually assaulted.

[identity profile] gonzo21.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 01:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, you're right. When I hear the phrase 'sexual assault', I think of a serious sexual assault. Something absolutely black and white out of order wrong which should result in very serious consequences for the committer thereof.

[identity profile] gonzo21.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 02:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Ah yes, interesting, I missed that.

Is it the same impulse, to defend the drunken snog, that winds up as defending Roman Polanski... hmm. I will have to think on that.

It reminds me of the debate on racism recently where I became very aware that generally the younger generation have a quite different interpretation of what a racist is, than older generations.

To me, for example, a racist is the skin head thug out on the streets smashing in peoples faces. Because that's what I encountered in my formative years. So to hear somebody being accused of being a racist, who isn't a skin-head thug, is quite shocking to me (an extreme example, but you get the gist I hope). It's an extremely powerful word. In the same way as 'sexual assault' is extremely powerful.

[identity profile] gonzo21.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 02:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, and I think perhaps for people like myself who were on the streets fighting the Neo-Nazis, it's quite deep-grained offensive to hear somebody being called a racist, who doesn't fit into our/my preconception of what a racist is.

And I'm convinced, as you say, that this was a major contribution to the whole racefail thing. Because I thought that was so depressing, where people who are all basically on the same side, were falling out with each other so visciously. While all the time the real racist assholes are still out there laughing themselves silly at our sides inability to get along.

(And I'm not convinced we have moved on so much from kicking people to death in the streets. Look at the lot of Muslims in the UK for example, or anybody with brown skin in America. Or indeed that the BNP are still around. Though thank the gods Nick Griffin has had to resign following their election failure.)

[identity profile] marrog.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 02:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Again I think you're missing something here, this time regarding the politics of privilege, and how damaging it is to real progress.

[identity profile] gonzo21.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 02:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh no, I do understand the concept. And I do admit that I am no doubt somewhat antiquated in my thinking on a lot of these issues, because I am a product of my environment where racists were skin head nazis, and sexual assaulters were rapist bastards who were largely protected by the police and society.

But at the same time I'm increasingly finding the politics of victim privilidge to also be damaging to real progress.

[identity profile] gonzo21.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 02:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh no, I do understand the concept. And I do admit that I am no doubt somewhat antiquated in my thinking on a lot of these issues, because I am a product of my environment where racists were skin head nazis, and sexual assaulters were rapist bastards who were largely protected by the police and society.

But at the same time I'm increasingly finding the politics of victim privilege to also be damaging to real progress.

I think at heart it comes down to, people interpreting the world in very very different ways. And to effect real change, you somehow have to challenge that, without making people feel defensive and threatened. Which... is a huge challenge for language.

[identity profile] marrog.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 02:21 pm (UTC)(link)
I think this is where use of language to lessen hard blows like that comes in. I got very angry when the newspapers kept blythly saying that Gordon Brown called Whatserface 'a bigot' all over the place. He never said that. He said she was 'a bigoted woman'. I think I can safely and categorically say that I am not a racist. I can equally categorically say that I have in the past said racist things. I am about as far as it gets from a homophobe but I have been guilty of homophobia. Being guilty of an indiscretion/prejudice does not mean that you are fit to be defined by it.

[identity profile] gonzo21.livejournal.com 2010-05-26 03:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Absolutely, I agree. And I think everybody has this to some extent. We all say dumb stupid insensitive things sometimes. It doesn't mean we're dumb and insensitive.

Which I think is one of the problems with the internet as a form of communication. A lot of things divorced from body language, sound quite different.