[identity profile] bart-calendar.livejournal.com 2010-09-24 12:33 pm (UTC)(link)
The "straight" statistics might be different if society clarified what "straight" and "gay" means.

I think most people take "gay" to mean "I want an emotional relationship with a member of my own sex."

In that context it's perfectly reasonable for 95 percent of the population to identify as "straight."

If the terms "bisexual" or "gay" were expanded to simply mean "I'm willing to or sometimes fantasize about having sex with someone of my own gender" the numbers would be quite different.

For example, I have no desire at all to date a dude. But, I've been with a couple girls who were really turned on by the idea of MMF threesome where both guys interacted sexually with each other.

It both cases it never happened (mostly because the guys she wanted to do it with either didn't want to have sex with a female as well as a male because they identified too strongly as gay, or else the guys thought it would be weird to interact with a straight guy or found one or both of us unattractive.)

Now, does the fact that I would have participated because I knew it would have turned those girls on make me bisexual? Probably on some level. Would I have answered the survey as bisexual, probably not, because I wouldn't think that was a truthful answer to their question.

[identity profile] bart-calendar.livejournal.com 2010-09-24 12:43 pm (UTC)(link)
See, I can't honestly say where that would place you and I, therefore I'd respond "straight" - but some people would disagree.

I think that 99 percent of non super religious people would engage in same sex play in some random perfect circumstance (that would be different for each person) but by standard societal definitions would be considered straight.

But, I can also see an argument that that makes everyone bisexual. It's murky waters.

I have a female friend whose husband is deep into her humiliating him sexually. Generally this involves peeing on him, telling him his dick is too small, pretending he can't make her cum when actually she has simply trained herself to be silent during orgasm, etc...

Because of this from time to time she force him to suck the cock of one of her gay friends. He gets turned on by it - but not because he wants to suck cock, but because it's humiliating to be sucking cock while your wife calls you a 'cocksucking faggot" and that turns him on.

Both him and his wife consider him straight (in fact if they considered him bisexual the thrill would be gone.)

Yet, I'm fairly certain bisexual activists would label him bisexual.

We need better terms than the ones we have, is all I'm saying

[identity profile] bart-calendar.livejournal.com 2010-09-24 12:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I mostly agree with you. I was just making the argument because of the way you phrased the link.

Really, I think that polls like this don't reveal much of anything, because people respond with what's comfortable for them.

I know several guys who I am sure would have clicked off the "gay" box on that form, despite the fact that when they are drunk and horny they often fuck girls.

And I've yet to have a single female friend who I know well enough to know who hasn't eaten pussy at least once, even though they all identify as straight.

For me, when I want to get laid, I want pussy, so I say "straight" but if Angelina Jolie told me I could do her doggy style if I blew Brad first, I'd be on my fucking knees in a heartbeat.

[identity profile] bart-calendar.livejournal.com 2010-09-24 12:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Exactly.