Quote of the Day

[andrewducker]

Small talk is the bane of the nerd’s existence because small talk is a combination of aspects of the world that your nerd hates. When your nerd is staring at a stranger, all he’s thinking is, “I have no system for understanding this messy person in front of me”. This is where the shy comes from. This is why nerds hate presenting to crowds.

The skills to interact with other people are there. They just lack a well-defined system.

From The Nerds Handbook
Which seems to be more of a handbook for dealing with nerds than one for nerds to read.

Comments

[supergee.livejournal.com]

Most of us are smart enough to realize that our intellectual superiority and our lack of primate grooming skills are independent variables.

[marrog.livejournal.com]

You say 'most' - I say 'some'.

[supergee.livejournal.com]

That's plausible; I certainly haven't taken a survey.

[marrog.livejournal.com]

And if you did I doubt I'd trust it if it was self-assessed... *grin*

[marrog.livejournal.com]

I should also clarify that I'm at times painfully socially stupid myself. I'm just also obsessed with ridding myself of my social flaws.

[khbrown.livejournal.com]

But what would it mean to be rid of social flaws? I'm thinking of something like The Conformist, where the protagonist's desire to be normal and liked leads to his being a fascist agent, or the charming psychopath who knows how to push the right buttons to seem likeable.

[marrog.livejournal.com]

Well, you have to hit a balance. So for example I'm a very frank person, sometimes to the point of bluntness. The thing I'm always trying to do is hit the balance between my frankness and honesty with people, which I consider an admirable and desirable trait, and the tactlessness and unnecessary (ie serving no purpose other than to bruise) bluntness that comes with it, which I strive to overcome. I also attempt to offset my naturally critical nature by also being disarmingly free with compliment and approval where I feel it. I do okay, but it's an ongoing mission.